tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-32111462012-02-16T15:32:31.370-05:00everything happens at the same timeAlecnoreply@blogger.comBlogger2711100tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-85613859940452229352010-05-14T18:57:00.002-04:002010-05-14T19:22:54.814-04:00

Writing here again ...After more digging, more pulling apart the machine, more x-ray analysis ...We come to the ever-recurring theme of angst! and masculinity! and how these themes! continually crop up in my daily mental and social life. I guess.So in summary it is this. I grew up without my dad. And at the time it was very difficult in an of itself, and of course, as part of a larger picture of

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-16515490814050735902008-03-04T13:14:00.002-05:002008-03-04T13:26:50.549-05:00

Hey there, so ... here was a thought I had today. A few minutes ago, actually, while reading what I think is the latest issue of the Conde Nast Traveler mag. There's a picture of a young couple in swimwear, guy holding the girl around the waist, both looking at the camera, happy. Somehow knowing while smiling that everybody will look at this picture and approve of everything, approve of their

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-32899505121905647712008-02-19T23:34:00.001-05:002008-02-19T23:38:44.922-05:00

Hello Holy Spirit! Help!

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-58513647075381234882008-01-23T11:13:00.000-05:002008-01-23T11:14:44.628-05:00

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-65544023357478050332007-12-22T23:18:00.001-05:002007-12-22T23:18:11.096-05:00

clear variable P : clear variable P*

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-35283709928156207832007-12-18T13:55:00.000-05:002007-12-18T14:08:05.073-05:00

Thoughts of P pop into my head recently. Strongly. I know it may not be the real P. Part of me is in complete denial about how the situation turned out with P. I guess I see things differently - I guess I see a P*. Shall we make that distinction? Thoughts of P* are in my mind.Part of me doesn't believe that things can turn out like this. Part of me can't believe that this happened. Part of me

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-44650059208526113612007-12-03T17:44:00.000-05:002007-12-03T17:47:59.778-05:00

I changed the template! And my stuff is popping up in French, why Blogger why? Do you secretly know who I are?

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-13456004885835038772007-11-08T18:29:00.000-05:002007-11-08T18:40:58.553-05:00

I know what it feels like to feel positive energy - I've felt it incidentally, and now I'm actually working on cultivating it with self discipline, and its working. I'm beginning to feel what its like to be happy in a way that I had to put on hold for more than ten years. It feels good, and I almost have a hard time recognizing it the state of mind sometimes, because its something I haven't felt

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-44104130088668934592007-10-30T18:07:00.000-04:002007-10-30T18:23:30.944-04:00

How my fool heart hates...I know those aren't the lyrics. I know. For some reason today, anger welled up in me. I thought of a long list of things to be angry at. And it burned me, didn't feel good. But for some minutes, I had a really hard time resisting the temptation to be angry. I couldn't force myself out of it, it seemed. So I decided to ride it out. I whispered to my good friend at work

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-70265352284873355932007-10-30T12:25:00.000-04:002007-10-30T13:38:10.410-04:00

I'm most clear headed in the mornings. Not deluded and entrapped by whatever foolish ideas of hopeless hope I tend to develop during the day.I realized this a while ago, and I don't know why it took me so long to write it here. Not that that's a bad thing - I was out there living life instead of writing about it or complaining about. Although, in integrating this particular event that ended this

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-86998042561922292152007-10-29T20:56:00.000-04:002007-10-30T00:27:00.749-04:00

So I let myself dream. And by and by I have. I do it less than I used to, but that's all right now. Right now I'm just enjoying being me, and being healthy, sociable, and responsible. That's attractive, at least to me. And I like the icing too: I like staying up late, I like drinking, and I like smoking. I like everything in that range, from nerdy to dirty. I have an incredible feeling for P. I

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-60318236778659955232007-10-25T11:34:00.000-04:002007-10-25T11:47:38.668-04:00

Well guess what, it came back. I guess it never goes away. Maybe it just changes direction, when it doesn't work out in one particular direction. But this hope always returns. And the thing is, its not just hope - its clarity of sight. I know this is going to work out for me, one way or another. I'm even really that concerned about it any more, because I know it'll work out.I guess I should let

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-19135353942149495782007-10-23T11:14:00.000-04:002007-10-23T11:33:29.303-04:00

So many times I felt like the character in that Justin Timberlake song.Funny thing about that isI was ready to give you my nameThought it was me and you, babeAnd now, it's all just a shameAnd I guess I was wrongGuess maybe I was. Guess this ain't gonna work out the way I had wished for for so long. Don't get me wrong or think me slow or stupid - mathematically, this outcome was kind of well known

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-68171772764999734632007-09-04T21:12:00.000-04:002007-09-04T21:14:40.077-04:00

i know i wrotethe last post. i'm hurt by absence. I want to be together with him. He's not just an alcoholic, he's not just a problem or disorder - he's a person he's myyy boyfriend! i wish i never broke up with him. I wish so many things. It'll all work out somehow.

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-38600120868616172422007-08-29T09:56:00.001-04:002007-08-29T10:07:04.388-04:00

About a year and a half ago, I met P. We became boyfriends and I fell in love. He did too. And then he chickened out and held back because he was afraid of the age difference.And he was also an alcoholic. He didn't tell me how he felt about anything. Turns out I met him when he was in a dry spell, when he was dressing his act for immigration.It didn't work out at all. He's an alcoholic. He had a

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-6073222111972077672007-07-31T21:12:00.001-04:002007-07-31T21:12:41.652-04:00

I dont wantto be alone but I dont want want to be in bad company!!!!!

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-67796321525887447302007-07-30T19:34:00.001-04:002007-07-30T19:34:45.380-04:00

that gives you something else to focus on, besides the pain. A distraction.

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-90142616429112814502007-07-30T19:33:00.001-04:002007-07-30T19:33:56.643-04:00

Then, you use them because they're simply a strong sensation, regardless of good or bad feeling. They are a sensation stronger than the pain, and

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-30770380798934305112007-07-30T19:32:00.000-04:002007-07-30T19:33:04.018-04:00

There are good reasons to do drugs - because they're extra, because they feel good. Then there's the bad use of drugs - the use to escape pain.

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-16722192114745452282007-07-29T20:03:00.001-04:002007-07-29T20:03:18.520-04:00

I miss being a son, dad, and I wish I could go home.

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-21665202072892557602007-07-20T21:00:00.001-04:002007-07-20T21:00:29.146-04:00

I think about joining the air force all the time.

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-74335143635384450712007-07-16T13:35:00.001-04:002007-07-16T13:35:24.847-04:00

I want to be part of a tight knit team. I want to make things. And yet I also want to be different, I want to be exceptional and unique.

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-43349855261523577812007-06-13T11:58:00.001-04:002007-06-13T11:58:20.150-04:00

sausage n egg is gettin nasty for breakfast. Lady on the train was bumping her bag on my crotch and I was geting a boner.

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-78475874071906376482007-06-11T10:10:00.001-04:002007-06-11T10:10:09.020-04:00

I'm happy! I'm not used to liking that. But I'll get the hang of it!

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-65634877083886981202007-06-09T13:39:00.001-04:002007-06-09T13:39:33.108-04:00

I now live in the village. I just got my futon. This is it - the end of an era. And the beginning of another one - mine!

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-90001925999037608842007-06-07T00:11:00.000-04:002007-06-07T00:12:38.414-04:00

I'm going to give me the chance I never had...!

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-74564851665440210202007-05-31T13:24:00.000-04:002007-05-31T13:44:19.879-04:00

My ability to evolve into the future depends on my ability to let go of the past.In order to become myself, I have to overcome myself.Of all the things I've never beenOf all the things I want to beOf all the things I've never seenI want to be me.Sometimes I think of the ideal person I want to be with - the characteristics, the qualities, the parameters. I realize now that those things are things

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-53606162533091925202007-05-29T22:04:00.000-04:002007-05-29T22:28:49.721-04:00

Nope, not your acetyl CoA.Not this ACoA.This is Adult Children of Alcoholics.This is what I am.That book made me realize so much, so much. I'm in a hundred pieces right now and I - I'm slowly reassembling myself. Its a visual metaphor I've had for ages, taken mostly from Terminator 2.It hurts to realize that this whole person I thought I was, I wasn't. I am not. I have not been. I haven't been me

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-46991166368470861132007-05-17T23:01:00.000-04:002007-05-29T22:02:43.217-04:00

Wow, look at the last meaningful post.Said I might have a job waiting for me when I got back from London.I did. Still got it, two raises, and a promotion!And now I'm moving out. Great to see these milestones!So so so different from who I used to be. Transformed. And more changes to come. I said it, didn't I: Evolve or Die.I didn't die.

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-37319236886560689492007-05-17T18:53:00.001-04:002007-05-17T18:53:49.678-04:00

This is test 2 of the mobile blogging system (email via SMS)

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-1166562700739975852006-12-19T16:11:00.000-05:002006-12-19T16:11:41.086-05:00

This is test 1 of the mobile blogging system

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-1153780853543071742006-07-24T18:17:00.000-04:002006-07-24T18:40:54.023-04:00

My album comin out soon son yeahMy albumNo, not really my album. I am not really releasing an album. And Mike Jones is this Houston rapper that my lil bro found a song from called "Who is Mike Jones" and is neat because its built around this sampled Pac Man beat.Anyway ...I might have a job waiting for me when I come back from vacation in London with my sister!I can move out!Yeah!!!!I'm so tired

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-1151697717834157882006-06-30T15:55:00.000-04:002006-06-30T16:01:57.940-04:00

I am mutating again, but this time I feel the world changing along with me, in sync, instead of being all bad. The events of my history pick up and swirl above me like leaves in a storm. What does it mean, nothing... its all about to end, to not matter any more. My entire history is about to be swept away and disappear. Here we go....!

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-1147821979253007112006-05-16T19:09:00.000-04:002006-05-16T19:26:19.313-04:00

Whoa - I didn't post this before! Last Friday, after leaving a totally lame job fair, I saw Josh Lucas in the street. Woo hoo! I am pretty sure he was wearing the same clothes you can see him wearing in his movie promotion special for Poseidon on Cinemax. Woo hoo! He's a little taller than me. Ooooh hooo! He's a fly guy! Well, there's someone for everyone, ain't that what they say?

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-1147377959729044602006-05-11T16:05:00.000-04:002006-05-11T16:06:05.720-04:00

sometimes i just want to glide forever

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-1147223001219600262006-05-09T21:03:00.000-04:002006-05-09T21:03:21.530-04:00

La la la are the best lyrics - why cant i be direct? La la la youre standing on my neck. La la la youre standing on my NECK. .... La la

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-1146885220875803232006-05-05T23:13:00.000-04:002006-05-05T23:13:41.386-04:00

the subway is perhaps the most revolting thing ive ever been in

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-1146614306946257982006-05-02T19:58:00.000-04:002006-05-02T19:58:27.373-04:00

I feel homeless even though im not.

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-1146529135934122002006-05-01T20:18:00.000-04:002006-05-01T20:18:55.943-04:00

gmail on my phone son what what and I could post directly from my fone to blogger. what what?

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-1146459398144031362006-05-01T00:56:00.000-04:002006-05-01T00:58:10.536-04:00

Inaugural mo blog - and not just cos im a goat...

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-1146189371301474352006-04-27T21:49:00.000-04:002006-04-27T21:56:11.313-04:00

Initially was: waiting for my rocket ship to come.Then were long days without a signNo vapor trail to hailIts arrival and my departureI know now(pass me the wrench)That it was to me to build my ownRocket ship into my blue skySo I tighten the screwsSo I bolt the latchSo I got my checklistAnd I flip the switchI am the rocket shipIn my mind's eyeI am the rocket shipI saw fly by

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-1145905260014781902006-04-24T14:55:00.000-04:002006-04-24T15:01:00.170-04:00

I thought I had written this here in the blog, but I had actually written it to my sister in email. Here's the important excerpts, because I woke up today feeling this with a very plain clarity that made me feel lighter and new. I had these thoughts before and during that week of passover, and I did change a lot then, and I guess the change is settling in even more now.***As for the Ph.D, which

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-1144824176124937952006-04-12T02:33:00.000-04:002006-04-13T02:07:34.616-04:00

Spring Break. I'm a be OT to Vegas in the first days. You can think up any mix you like any life you want, rapping in outer space naked up in straps. Anything. Classical music and whipped cream and motorcycles and gymnastics. Delicious. Sunglasses for the moon and tanning butter for your a-s-s. Vegas. Going out to teach bitches about math in the desert. Why she get her nose fixed? Why she got

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-1144036923037241952006-04-02T23:55:00.000-04:002006-04-03T00:02:03.050-04:00

Yo I was listening to some music. A song. And then the same song again. Thence I took up the drizzo. And then, although I had just heard the same song, then it hit me. Time slowed down during the song! Whoa!

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-1144026009426267712006-04-02T20:35:00.000-04:002006-04-02T21:00:09.476-04:00

So! Das bitch tryna trap me!She opens my mail, which contains a letter from my grad school, saying, dot dot dot, they're trying to get rid of me, instead of letting me take my leave of absence. Fuck them! So she waves this in my face, trying to tell me "you're in danger, but you have a chance if you stay with me!" Ryte bitch NOT.Also on today's drama menu was the "I have a lot of bills to pay, I

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-1143948560038329152006-04-01T22:18:00.000-05:002006-04-01T22:29:20.050-05:00

Yo! Got back from Atlantic City with Taz, Tristan, Gia, Taria. It was OK. The best part was of course, was the beach, the bar, and Gia's candy bars. Gambling is for ppl who bad at math lol. It was fun to get away though, see friends and a new place. There are some crazy pictures of us. I'll edit them into this post, so check back later!

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-1143277607352675912006-03-25T02:31:00.000-05:002006-03-25T04:11:47.176-05:00

Italics: previous entries in this very blog.Orange bold: today’s commentary and interpretation.Maroon bold: some questionsWe're not here because we're free, we're here because we're not free.The tide of war returns. Deja vu cos I'm writing the same blogs I wrote this time last year, and the year before. The war is in the mind. She knows just what to strings to pull, what buttons to push, but like

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-1143001425270153122006-03-21T23:10:00.000-05:002006-03-23T22:59:22.570-05:00

My housewarming party was hot! Taz and Gia brought me some hot liquor! Tristan brought limes! Mike and Randy and Irene came over too. The Asian people hand squeezed the limes to make lime juice for Soco and Lime (I'm on the grind all the time baby). And there was Bailey's (but some people drank most of that!). And behold, there was the invention of a new drink, called tha Sunny G (in honor of Gia

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-1140585957543464642006-02-22T00:03:00.000-05:002006-02-22T00:30:06.803-05:00

I broke another blade last week. Again during the fleche. Surprised though, cos it was an FIE blade. Oh well. On that touch it did bend the wrong way though. I used to have too many blades, but I might have to reorder soon. Yay... new stuff!Friendster has cool horoscope that is very on point. It is as follows:The Bottom LineYou are entering a selfish phase in your life, but it's a good and

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-1139253942496163232006-02-06T14:25:00.000-05:002006-02-22T00:28:15.093-05:00

Life ain't a track meetIts a marathonFuck the cemetery that a fencer gets buried on

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-1138258853330144822006-01-26T01:51:00.000-05:002006-01-26T02:00:53.343-05:00

Down-South girls got them real big buttsReal big butts make ya man wanna look(Oh!)Back it up, flip it up, skinny girls - yuck!Love my gut, so fuck a tummy tuck(Oh yeaaah?) Yeah! I shakes my buttI shakes my gut like "yeah, bitch what?"-Missy ElliotMinus the big butts and beer gut ... that's pretty much how I feel about fencing now. I like it. Fencing time, 3 days a week, is probably the time that

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-1138040669223266082006-01-23T13:23:00.000-05:002006-01-23T13:24:29.233-05:00

Hey a red balloon just rose up past my window...

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-1137997975154487372006-01-23T00:52:00.000-05:002006-01-23T01:32:55.220-05:00

zwitterionic: a molecule carrying both a positive and a negative charge.Lovely little ions, zwittering about. Lovely!The path of my mind through my history has been like the body of a snake through grass, or the trail of a rocket through the sky. But I've been dealing with living with a crazy person for a long time now. I thought I could cancel it out but it all adds up. I've been pressured into

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-1137638760512332422006-01-18T21:32:00.000-05:002006-01-18T21:46:00.550-05:00

So I finally went back to my fencing club and fenced and it was aich oh tee. I putteth the smack down. I broke the blade that I just rewired the night before, lol. I did it in a fleche ... which was incidentally touch #15 in a 15 point bout. My light goes on at full extension of the fleche, and then as I power through with the cross over it folds in half and breaks. Oooch. No blood, no worries!I

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-1136653533572468232006-01-07T12:02:00.000-05:002006-01-07T12:08:27.866-05:00

So I'm reading my friend Gia's blog, and she posted up this horoscope, and I generally don't believe in them (except for this one!!!) but they're usually funny. So I read hers, and it sounded clever. Here's mine from the same source....CANCER (June 21-July 22): There's no delicate way to say this, so please stop reading and come back next week if you're offended by graphic references to pleasure.

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-1136595540140005752006-01-06T19:57:00.000-05:002006-01-06T19:59:00.153-05:00

OMG WTF installing Microsoft Office ... that I actually bought ... and it doesn't work ...Anything produced by MS is a fucking train wreck waiting to happen. Just in case you didn't know.

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-1136267604272865192006-01-03T00:48:00.000-05:002006-01-03T00:53:24.283-05:00

Education is a state-controlled manufactory of echoes. - Norman Douglas

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-1135363586728650972005-12-23T13:44:00.000-05:002005-12-23T13:46:26.736-05:00

Titanic + Jurassic Park 2 + Starship Troopers + General Hospital = King KongI have never seen a white lady run up that many stairs in a single movie. When she ran out of stairs, she climbed up some ladders!

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-1135097916323768362005-12-20T11:47:00.000-05:002005-12-20T11:58:36.366-05:00

I don't have them frequently, but I have these dreams with a recurring scenario. I'm in some nice place. Its usually got a bit of a small town feel to it, but still kind of culturally rich. Like I often pass by a bookstore I really like. And I'm with a guy, and I feel really good about him, and then I'll just go to kiss him, and then he'll get all fidgety. He likes me, and the kiss, but he's very

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-1134683247481281372005-12-15T16:33:00.000-05:002005-12-15T16:47:27.516-05:00

what the hell to do with my life? I am sooo unsatisfied with the PhD program. Feel like it won't get me anything. I don't feel like sacrificing another 5 years to someone else's dream. The classes are like I haven't just gone to school for four years.Some part of me feels like this is all wrong, the PhD program. The feeling you get when you wake up on the train. You're not sure where you are, but

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-1134541559051332382005-12-14T01:07:00.000-05:002005-12-14T01:25:59.086-05:00

I started talking to God or the Holy Spirit again. It was so funny. I hadn't done it in years, maybe not since I was 12 or younger. All this time without talking to Him. But when I did it today, it felt so natural, so right, so easy. I remembered right away the process: how to do it, what it felt like... I remembered right away the last time I did it, as I used to.The connection made me realize

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-1134449570850974072005-12-12T23:47:00.000-05:002005-12-12T23:53:02.926-05:00

Awww durn. I done pissed myself but somethin good. What's the point a hurryin these things?The light is here. I have forgiven the world. I have forgiven myself.

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-1134102255508879642005-12-08T22:55:00.000-05:002005-12-08T23:24:15.553-05:00

So: my mom and my dad hate each other. But they still have things in common. They have the same model of cell phone. They both are always buying new laptops. Example: a month or so ago, I spilled some chai on my mom's laptop keyboard. Nothing fried, but some keys didn't work. Manic bitch fit. I say I can fix it, just need to swap out the keyboard with a replacement I ordered. Craziness, and she

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-1133932042174628492005-12-07T00:05:00.000-05:002005-12-07T00:07:29.203-05:00

Me and my older brother. Great minds think alike. Or something, whatever.[23:26] jcz606: yo check it out[23:26] jcz606: someone is stealing lamp posts in baltimore[23:26] jcz606: 130 of them[23:27] jcz606: they are aluminum, 30 feet tall, 250 pounds[23:27] pierre_ismail: ok. any word on what they're doing with them?[23:28] jcz606: no. prolly terrorists tryna get some aluminum toobs[23:29]

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-1133857026043425742005-12-06T03:16:00.000-05:002005-12-06T03:17:06.053-05:00

Time will be taken out of service today. Like the bad train to nowhere that it is.

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-1133241434274207972005-11-29T00:08:00.000-05:002005-11-29T00:17:14.286-05:00

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-1132702165882624302005-11-22T18:05:00.000-05:002005-11-22T18:29:25.960-05:00

scholarly angst. Been cutting class cos none of my learning occurs there. Got called in to see the dept head. Told her all about it. Outcome: tell the prof yourself how he needs to, um, make a coherent lesson plan. And go to the waste of time class anyway.I'm not educatedextra caffeinatedI just masturbatednow I'm motivatedcan't live with us?!you cant live without us!we fake and you take it,and

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-1132102991142786662005-11-15T19:59:00.000-05:002005-11-15T20:03:11.156-05:00

Thought about joining the Air Force. It kind of scares me, but in a lot of ways felt like the right thing to do. But our armed forces are controlled by an administration I do not have confidence in. At a basic level, I know that's part of something you give up thinking about once you decide to serve. For now, that's why I'm not doing it. But otherwise, I consider it.

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-1131594305004549812005-11-09T22:39:00.000-05:002005-11-09T22:45:05.016-05:00

I want to idly play with my boyfriend's hair as he rests in my arms on the couch.

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-1131500113043057082005-11-08T20:18:00.000-05:002005-11-08T20:35:13.080-05:00

this post is also subtitled fuck schoolSo we had one set of profs for the first half the semester. They were in the range of OK-Good.Then they switched it up and gave us crappy ass profs. Like this one prof, I'm a call him prof OPP. Doesn't give us a book, no handouts. Fucker's got a web page, with a hundred links on it. And his lectures are on shit like, I'm a click on mad links real quick and

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-1130864056876462432005-11-01T11:53:00.000-05:002005-11-01T11:54:16.886-05:00

Hello. I am tired of the extreme cold. I also just need to change. Therefore, I am moving south.

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-1130364746793225282005-10-26T17:59:00.000-04:002005-10-26T18:12:26.840-04:00

So then, these are some shots from the Crime Scene, Randizzle's birthday. OMG LOL WTF.The Future: well, I'm back into programing at the same lab as last year. I've read the papers and methods and I get the concept of the derivation. But based on everything I've read and learned, especially NKS, I don't think this is the approach I'm interested in. This whole PhD will be like this. Maybe its time

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-1130209913179331482005-10-24T23:04:00.000-04:002005-10-24T23:14:05.826-04:00

Foil-ass lunge about to CH ...Hmm, I stepped in something...

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-1130123887575859232005-10-23T22:54:00.001-04:002005-10-23T23:18:09.586-04:00

Friday - Tristan invites us to the best excursions. Caught up with T and Gia and Diana at Pop - a nice lounge where T's friend was spinning. I had tequila, y despues me llamo patron cos I think I had two shots of patron: silver and gold (?). I equilibrated to being drunk, and I was all over the couch. Good times. G was dancing with T, even though I suppose Pop isn't made for that. Psss, Like we

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-1130123888555084022005-10-23T22:54:00.000-04:002005-10-23T23:18:09.586-04:00

Friday - Tristan invites us to the best excursions. Caught up with T and Gia and Diana at Pop - a nice lounge where T's friend was spinning. I had tequila, y despues me llamo patron cos I think I had two shots of patron: silver and gold (?). I equilibrated to being drunk, and I was all over the couch. Good times. G was dancing with T, even though I suppose Pop isn't made for that. Psss, Like we

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-1129785427069731202005-10-20T00:25:00.000-04:002005-10-20T01:17:07.113-04:00

So my BA almost wasn't my BA. For four years my life almost wasn't my life. For the next five years, I'm going to be in school, doing someone else's research. Is that what I want? I'm honestly not sure. If I think of it as "just a job", then I don't really care. If I think of it as me being really me in every possible way, then I guess not. If there were some way, somehow I could be in an

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-1129686201089733722005-10-18T21:37:00.000-04:002005-10-18T21:43:21.093-04:00

Saw Doom movie. Spoilers, slightly.Warning: Spoilers Follow.1st half of movie was a bit too long.2nd half of movie was way better: more twisted, more engaging, more psychological. Or just more psycho.

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-1129073502071240632005-10-11T19:29:00.000-04:002005-10-11T19:31:42.076-04:00

I want to go home, from where I have run for so long.

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-1128913674506250882005-10-09T23:02:00.000-04:002005-10-10T01:14:02.013-04:00

Today we made butter crack. It was slow but good.Today we experimented with a butter solvent system.Next time we may experiment with a high fat milk solvent system.On the sands of Arrakis, I tend the oasis and welcome the desert rose.

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-1128750922110142932005-10-08T01:49:00.000-04:002005-10-08T02:00:11.683-04:00

I used to live in Paris, right, and I used to hang out, but just a little, with this guy named Oliver. And of all the crazy guys I hung out with in Paris, Oliver was nice in his own way. He was part friend, part hottie. Part bartender. Part crazy, part wonderful. I can only remember good things about Oliver; I think I would like to spend time with him. He helped me understand some things about

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-1127786564336552792005-09-26T22:01:00.000-04:002005-09-26T22:02:44.343-04:00

So supposedly in about three weeks from tomorrow (when I hand in the last part of the application) I'll get my stipend by direct deposit. And then I can begin the moving out! Awesome!

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-1127180728561657422005-09-19T21:44:00.000-04:002005-09-19T21:45:28.566-04:00

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-1127098227628726602005-09-18T22:46:00.000-04:002005-09-18T22:50:27.636-04:00

Went sailing today with my Golan! And his friend Tomoko! And it was awesome! We sailed in a bootleg fashion up this lake, docked at a restaurant, ate. Sailed again and back. Awesome! Golan is really really cool. Maybe not for fencing, but otherwise, yes!

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-1125978417008003272005-09-05T23:45:00.000-04:002005-09-05T23:46:57.013-04:00

so... to recap a lost post ...Its a quiet evening and I'm studying chem and that's great! After all the struggles and failures and successes ... am I who I want to be? Yes.

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-1125287137005284162005-08-28T23:40:00.000-04:002005-08-28T23:45:37.006-04:00

That silver chill feeling? Yep, it was the Holy Spirit and the Holy Instant. This is the last year time will exist, because after we have thought it through and thought through it, we will give it up. We will let time go. And having nowhere to go to, it will disappear, having never existed. Therefore we welcome you to enjoy True Life: Love Unlimited by bodies, time, or space. Universal. This is

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-1124590042217847842005-08-20T22:06:00.000-04:002005-08-20T22:07:22.223-04:00

Some days you feel like ...

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-1122803828856714632005-07-31T05:55:00.000-04:002005-07-31T05:57:08.866-04:00

ok so no go cannot change air ticket, I must return on the 10 Aug. See you all then!

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-1122508282133934932005-07-27T19:20:00.000-04:002005-07-27T19:51:22.150-04:00

I am a Love Captain on a mission from God and Team Heaven to bring Love all over the world.And I would like to have a semi-thick Scottish accent, I've decided. And a Scottish boyfriend. Ah yes.I'm trying to get back to New York a week earlier than I said (10 Aug) so I can organize my life more! Who's down to see Stealth with me?

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-1122374079175390122005-07-26T06:29:00.000-04:002005-07-26T06:34:39.183-04:00

hey everyone - I may have already said this but I'm in London and everything's fine and I've snapped some pix of my excellent family and will post some up as soon as I get my hands on a USB cable.

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-1121791278060885182005-07-19T12:36:00.000-04:002005-07-19T12:48:57.350-04:00

Hey everyone! So I'm in beautiful Georgia now, at South Cross Ranch. I ride horses twice a day and help clean them up. Its wonderful. Riding horses is cool. When I get back I want to go horse riding in Central Park at least once, even if it is expensive. I'm acquiring all my secret agent skills! Hopefully this picture will show.

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-1121141120320088782005-07-11T23:58:00.000-04:002005-07-12T00:05:20.326-04:00

so my time in the program has taught me that time does not exist, and can be reorganized in any way. It is in this sense that I chose not to begin (??) this entry by saying "now that the program is over..." because it, like everything else, has no true dimension in limited time, the experience is not limited by time, and that would be the implication if I had begun (ha ha) by saying "now that it

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-1120453546657450052005-07-04T01:05:00.000-04:002005-07-04T01:39:55.073-04:00

So its pretty late right now, but must post some stuff here. Went on a day trip to Newport today with NKS friend Sam and his wife and other NKS friend Paul. Very Cool! Saw some mansions, and the fireworks. Eating, laughing, walking. Ingredients for a good time! The picture adding functionality is not working on Blogger right now...[update]all new pix uploaded to ImageStation. How to see?Go to

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-1120345164631581022005-07-02T18:59:00.000-04:002005-07-02T18:59:24.636-04:00

Hey y'all its your friend Larry Croft writing from my gigantic and beautiful estate... So let's see, last adventure was the weekend WaterFire. So last night (Fri) I go out with some more friends in the program and the mission is to throw back drinx and pick up chix. Ha ha! Whatever! It started off sedate, but we migrated to a couple different places where there was more dancing, activated more

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-1120013280926408482005-06-28T22:47:00.000-04:002005-06-28T22:48:00.933-04:00

Hey, so finally there's net in the dorms, sort of, and I can update you about stuff. So there's this weekend event in Providence called WaterFire (waterfire.com) where they light the river on fire and have loads of events and stuff. They had food carts in the street, and a little rock climbing wall. You know I went up that thing with the quickness! I was with a couple friends in the program. One

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-1119495574174584532005-06-22T22:44:00.000-04:002005-06-22T23:05:50.433-04:00

Hey all!Pitchas maybe only on my return. Not drunk this time. Classes are beginning to pay off, in the sense that I had a class today that I actually enjoyed and got involved in, and saw connections to my science project in. That was joyful. Also, I met the head expert over here, to devise a project idea. He came up with something that was quite a bit different from what I was thinking of at

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-1119407479236386182005-06-21T22:26:00.000-04:002005-06-21T22:31:19.243-04:00

So a quick rewind and recap:::homesick the night of the first day upon arrivingby the beginning of the second day I felt much better; halfway homeby the afternoon and eve of the second day, much much better. Place was like home already. I love me and God loves me. I'm ready to go home. Explored my mansion today. Very nice. Listen y'all, I drizzank and I aint postin no pitchas tonyte. But lata.

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-1119320619222083762005-06-20T22:14:00.000-04:002005-06-20T22:23:50.476-04:00

Alryte sun I'm in Brown Uni now. And this is hot. Yeah, I know I'm mad nerdylicious type nerdy nerd, but the campus is neat, city seems neat. People I cross in the street actually say "Hello" as a matter of course. Striking! I'm letting Jesus into my heart! I was a bit scared that my Mathematica programming wasn't up to par, but I know I can do it. Just like I climbed that big ass rock wall.

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-1113535988328348502005-04-14T23:25:00.000-04:002005-04-14T23:33:08.326-04:00

I want to be Dirk Pitt. I want to be an adventurer. Fuck this science stuff. I don't want to be a permanent nerd, sacrificing everything to be a permament nerd all maxed out nerdylicious type nerd. I want to be mad adventurous and diving and snorkeling.

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-1112130670373279042005-03-29T16:08:00.000-05:002005-03-29T16:11:10.373-05:00

Alecnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3211146.post-1111557744702471182005-03-23T00:47:00.000-05:002005-03-23T01:02:24.703-05:00

We in life that we see with our eyes also yet move and are moved over a hypersurface of relations not always readily apparent but always there ... and so in the game Devil May Cry 3, we see something good. I always like the bad guys ... I usually think people just don't understand them. And then that's how I became a "bad guy", just by the fact of not being understood by other people. I became

Alecnoreply@blogger.com